Attracting True Love

It’s very simple, but some people won’t believe it. If you want love from another, if you want the perfect mate, you first have to LOVE YOURSELF!!! The reason for this is that our thoughts attract to us exactly what we think we deserve. If we love ourselves, we will attract a good partner. If we don’t love ourselves, we will attract an unsuitable partner, perhaps an abuser. I know- I am a survivor of domestic violence, and I didn’t love myself until just a few years ago.

The first step involved is to gain an awareness of the fact that we are not always in full control, even of our own minds. This is often in direct conflict with our ego who likes to imagine all is under its control; however, we must not let delusion get the best of us. One simple way of understanding this is to think about what happens when we try to keep something in mind for an extended period of time. What usually happens? The mind gets bored. When we wish to focus our mind on something, we tend to have to fight to keep it there. If we do not exert a substantial amount of effort, our mind will have the tendency to wander off to more exciting and alluring distractions. Just imagine the harm that this can cause in our magickal workings. Who knows what subconscious intentions we are putting into our works without even knowing it? The mind is moving and working constantly (even when we think we are holding it still), and we must continually remind ourselves of this if we are to one day master it. If we do not keep this knowledge firmly in mind, we will never pay close enough attention to the mind’s inner workings to see all of the subtle tricks that it can play.

The second step is to gain an awareness of the fact that we can at least have some control over this process through various techniques of mental cultivation. First, we have to work constantly at strengthening our mindfulness so that we can become increasingly more aware of what is actually going on within the vast, complex structure of our minds. In simpler terms, we must flex our mental muscles to keep them in shape, and exercise effort to keep our mindfulness sharp and alert at all times. Simple breath meditations or some other form of mindfulness training can be done to help develop this. Next, we need to observe these mental processes in action. We have to be as aware of our intentions as we can be (i.e. know why we are about to do something), and then observe the consequences of the actions that follow. Even after the fact -- when we believe the outcome of our actions to be good, bad, or neutral -- we still need to be aware of possible changes, since the full results can take time to mature. Quite often, the way that it usually works is that the mind intends, we act according to those intentions, and then we simply forget about it. This is just plain sloppy. We need to remain continuously alert and sensitive to what we are doing at any given time. The power we will eventually learn to wield is not a toy by any stretch of the imagination.

The third step is to refine the first two steps until they are able to be performed effortlessly. This means that we have to practice everyday, and constantly be aware of whatever arises in our experience regardless of the outcome. We must remind ourselves to pay close attention to these mental qualities, and what effect they have on our actions. If things are going well, we simply note that and try to learn why they seem to be going well. Conversely, if things are not going well, we simply note that and try to learn why they seem not to be going well. Sometimes we may learn that the reasons why things turned out the way they did were completely out of our control, but other times we may learn exactly what it was that we did to influence the outcome. In essence, we are becoming mindful of precisely how our intentions influence our actions, and how those actions produce results. In this way, we will learn to have more control over our magickal workings in the future. This is not the end of the training, however, because we still must work on the intentions themselves.

There is a thinking stuff from which all things are made, and which, in it original state, permeates, penetrates, and fills the interspaces of the universe. A thought, in this substance, produces the thing that is imaged by the thought. We can form things in our thoughts, and, by impressing our thoughts upon formless substance, can cause the thing we think about to be created.